It can be uncomfortable, unusual, sometimes terrifying or even painful, but receiving feedback is a quick and essential means of self-development. As well, having a good idea of how others perceive us is important to boost leadership, even if this perception is not necessarily an accurate reflection of who we are. However, it is difficult to receive feedback and to apply it, even if the other person’s intention is to help us. It has to do with ego and with the human mind which reacts to “danger” and prefers rewards…
So why wait to receive it at a time when you least expect it or only at the annual meeting with your manager? Why hesitate to ask for feedback when it could accelerate your professional development? Because feedback is not always well worded, especially when we are talking about feedback on areas in need of improvement. The answer? Ask for the feedback that you want to receive (at the time when you want to receive it) and instruct the person giving feedback in how you want it to be formulated.
- You feel that you are repeating the same mistakes and want an alternative.
- You want to get out of your comfort zone and accelerate the development of a specific skill.
- You wish to establish relationships based on trust and authenticity.
- You want your team and colleagues to openly and respectfully tell you that there is something not working and that it involves you.
- You want to set an example, and contribute to the creation of a culture of improvement on honest exchanges.
A few tips to repeat to yourself to optimize your position, before and during feedback:
- No one is perfect, and there is no use in comparing yourself to others.
- This is a learning opportunity, a gift that the other person is giving to you by providing you with information that is useful for your development.
- The other person’s intentions are to be helpful, and you are asking them for something that is not that easy to do.
- You have room to manoeuvre and options regarding the feedback you receive.
- You can always ask for specific information to ensure that you have completely understood now or later.
- The relationship with this person will increase trust.
FOR MORE INFO
- SCARF Model – A Practical Guide to Giving and Receiving Employee Feedback, QuantumWorkplace.com
- The tool How to Step Into Discomfort to Accelerate Your Development is a complement.